i’m like 97% sure i’d be the best girlfriend ever but no one will ever know
(Source: harrystears, via iwrestledabraonce)
do u ever go to school confident in what ur wearing and then u actually get there and ur kind of just like wow well this was an awful idea
(via just-waste-a-lifetime)
- What I actually say: I find serial killers interesting.
- What other people hear: I am a serial killer.
guys i’m literally so out of shape like internet explorer could probably run faster than me
(via vivlio)
i was sitting in the bathroom today when like 5 girls walked in and i stopped pooping right away cause i didn’t want them to hear me but then i thought why is taking a shit so bastardized today like why cant i poop in peace in the privacy of my own stall without caring if people listen to the flop flop plop plop sploosh sploosh like damn just sing along to the ploop blop and enjoy symphony no. 9 a la my asshole
omg i poop freely
it’s okay everyone poop where you want to, this is america
(via aloof-thinker)
